Who’s in the Market for a Field?

birch tree with leaves and peeling bark

A sermon on Jeremiah 31: 1-3a, 6-15 preached at Wesley Memorial UMC during Family Weekend at UVA.

 I sit through a lot of meetings and read a lot of articles about The State of the Church.  As you may have heard, we are older, we are smaller, our buildings are in need of repair, and we aren’t as flush as we used to be.  I’m not seeking out these meetings and articles – they are hard to escape.  A vocal and vigilant group of church Chicken Littles wants to make sure everyone else knows the sky is falling. 

In a lot of the church we have decided the way to “fix” our problems is to frantically recruit young people, to become less building-focused, and to count everything.  Most of the angst and worry seems to be backward-looking – how can we have church like we did in 1958 when, if you wanted to fit in to polite society church is just what you did and there were fewer distractions like Netflix or Sunday soccer, and people had more time since only 1 person in the couple worked (guess which one? and everyone was in a couple)? 

             What if, instead of the articles and hand-wringing conferences about the dearth of young people in church, we the church took that missing group seriously enough to find out where they are instead?  What’s Sunday like for them?  Weekends?  Family life?  Why?  What’s spirituality like for them?  Tell me more about it.  Help me understand you.  And, what if we didn’t do this as a ploy to pull them “back” into church, but because it’s the kind of thing Jesus would do – seeking out the people overlooked or despised by the religious authorities and treating them as children of God, brothers and sisters…

            I can hear the Chicken Littles now.  But we don’t have time for that!  We need someone to lead the youth group now.  We need to build a better budget and those young folks are the workers now.  We don’t have time to sit around and listen to their lives – we were young once, we remember what it was like – and, besides, the sky is falling!

            Have you noticed how the most faithful, God-oriented moments in life are often the ones that, on the surface, make no sense?  Do you have some of those in your life?  In my own life, I once drove several hundred miles out of my way to see a guy I’d had only two dates with – and who ended up becoming my husband.  God calls to us across the strange terrain of long road trips and unexpected random acts of kindness and the seemingly strange last-minute switches of your major or you career.  Often these moments and decisions don’t seem like wise choices to the onlookers in our lives.

They can even seem foolhardy or wasteful.  Like trying to stretch 7 loaves and 2 fish to feed 5000.  Like leaving 99 sheep on their own in order to go find the one who’s lost.  Like standing on a hillside proclaiming that the meek will inherit the earth.

            Or, like buying real estate in the middle of a war zone.

            In a city under siege at that very moment, with the Babylonians pounding at the gates and about to conquer Jerusalem and capture its people, God instructs Jeremiah to buy a plot of land.  If ever there was Chicken Little territory this was it.  The sky may not have been falling but the walls were crumbling, the gates were giving way, and armies were on the move.  Jeremiah himself has been warning the people for 31 chapters by this point – warning them to turn from their idolatry and come back to the one true God.  Then, at the moment when all he’s been saying is in the process of coming true, God tells him to buy a field right in the middle of all that turmoil, chaos, and heartbreak. 

And God tells Jeremiah to put the deed in a jar so it will “last for a long time…  [because] Houses and fields and vineyards shall again be bought in this land” (32: 15).  It’s a bet on the future, grounded in the hope of God’s promise that even this sad and forlorn day is not the end of the story.  It’s also a metaphor for our hearts, upon which this promise has been written.  The fertile soil of our hearts will be purchased, developed, and rebuilt by God.

I think this is one of the most radical, hope-filled moments in the entire Bible….  To purchase a piece of land that’s already been captured, as you are about to be captured next – while proclaiming God is up to something good.  If we were to set it today’s world, it might look like a prisoner who studies for her GED and works on her resume even though she has 20 more years to go on her sentence.  It might look like a Syrian teenager applying to college with rockets overhead and gunmen on the corners.  It might look like a small church with a shrinking budget investing in people who aren’t members.

What a flimsy-seeming sign of hope – a slip of paper bought in a war zone.  Flimsy and vulnerable, like a baby born in a stable. 

This is the way God works:  with what seems small or meaningless or not quite enough – and with the long view.  Jeremiah had a deed but there was a long way to go before the houses and vineyards would sprout up on that land.  Mary had a baby but it was a long time before the world could see it had a savior.

This is the way hope works:  It’s about choosing to believe that God makes good on God’s promises and that we will never be left to our own devices. 

            The Chicken Littles may think the church has the deed to a worthless plot of decaying buildings and rundown property.  No matter what it looks like from here, the truth is God’s given us a field and a promise.  We don’t have to just wait for the vineyards to appear – we can help plant them.       

We can live in bold hope during uncertain times.  Hope is not the same thing as wishing.  Wishing takes us backward to the way things used to be or into our own imagination, where we concoct what we think would be a better future.  Hope, on the other hand, takes us into God’s imagination, offering a glimpse so we’ll recognize it when it gets here…a taste so we are hungry for it.  Hope means behaving now as if what God promises is already happening – because it is.

The vineyards and new houses are waiting for us.  Do you see them?  We can reacquaint ourselves with our neighbors, simply because they are our neighbors.  We can go, like Jesus, to where the people are and consider that perhaps we are the ones who need to change in order for the church to work.  We may be called on to spend the last dollar we have on a field in this war zone.  Or on taking a student to coffee when there is no time to waste and no line item in the budget for that kind of thing. 

I happen to work in part of the church where we are flush with young people.  I also happen to work in part of the church that relies on the rest of the church for support.  So, believe me, I understand the dilemma and I feel the pinch.  But I need to point out this obvious fact:  we do have some young people.  Excellent, passionate, faithful disciples who happen to be under 25. So while I do think we need to pay attention to who isn’t here and go out to them and learn about them and figure out how to be better neighbors to them….I also think we need to pay better attention to those who are already here. 

A few years back I was talking with our Wesley Foundation student president at the time.  She had been involved and in leadership at Wesley her entire time in college.  Because she came from one our district churches, that church was even involved in helping to bring food for Thursday night dinners – so they saw firsthand what she was up to here at UVA and they obviously supported campus ministry.  But she told me once that what she loved most about the Wesley Foundation was she could actually do things and lead things here.  She said, “At my home church they would never let me lead anything.”  They had a young, faithful, creative person who’d honed her leadership here in college but who wouldn’t have been asked to join the Trustees at her own church.  She hadn’t served her time to work up to that position.  She needed to pay her dues and listen to her elders a while longer.  That right there is a failure of imagination on the part of her church.  That’s a church that would rather believe in their own abilities to raise a few sour grapes in captivity than believe that God had already purchased a piece of land for a bountiful vineyard.

Let me be clear here:  we are all in this together.  We are all called to become better neighbors to those in our midst – not just to those in our pews.  Students and young people, you are not off the hook when the church’s imagination is impoverished and they don’t listen to your ideas or make you head of something the moment you arrive.  You are also called to invest in this strange war-torn piece of land, to seek out new neighbors.  Who do you see without seeing in your daily rounds of Grounds?  Whose name do you need to learn at the social hour after church?  Where will you invest with hope?

If I wanted to be crankier than I already am, I could spend a lot of time shooting down student ideas and telling them how we tried that once 20 years ago.  Or I could worry more about whether the church will continue to fund campus ministry. 

But I choose hope. 

The church will not look like it did 50 years ago 50 years from now – or even in 5.  And I think that’s a good thing.  God is doing a new thing.  God has a slip of paper with our names written on it and it’s more important and valuable than all that pounding at the gate and chunks of sky falling to the ground.  There is more to come.  God is not done with the church or young people or any one of us yet.  Just you wait for the next chapter!   And, while you’re waiting, how about asking the Starbucks barista what his life is like?  How about taking a student to coffee?

Thanks be to God!

Phone Booth Redecoration and Other Futile Pastimes

red uk phone booths in the snow

© 2013 Oatsy40

I heard Nadia Bolz-Weber speak during our United Methodist Campus Ministry Association conference in Denver last week.  I am not a tattooed person, mainly because I can’t imagine picking something I would still like in 20 years.  (I change glasses frames every couple of years!)  Nadia, who is amply tattooed, is the kind of fierce, attractive, solid person who makes you take notice.  She even made me sort of want a tattoo.

But that’s not what this post is about.  It’s about desperation. 

Nadia made an observation that was so spot on, I laughed out loud and I’m still thinking about it.  She pointed out that just because people are cynical about institutions does not mean they don’t want what the institutions have promised.  So, though folks may be hesitant about and suspicious of church as an institution, they may also be hungry for community, God-space, ritual, sacrament…. 

She also observed that it’s near impossible these days to find a phone booth and that one could conclude from this evidence that people are no longer interested in communicating by phone.  Clearly, the wrong conclusion to draw.

red bubble-shaped phone booth

© 2006 Ben Tesch

Because she pastors a church with many young people in it, she often gets questions from other pastors about how to get young people to come to their churches.  Many of these questions have the air of desperation about them, anxious people asking her how to redecorate their phone booths so that people will use them again.

Well now, preach it, sister.

Irish phone booth

© 2012 Peter Mooney

What a refreshing (though hilarious and sad) image.  What a helpful breath of fresh air in the circular church conversations going on these days.  The takeaway from her observation is that if we are more concerned about the phone booth than the people we hope will use it, we have missed the point.  The phone booth served its purpose in its time.  But why would we keep using resources to clean and repair them on every street corner while every person who walks by is already talking on her own mobile phone? 

People do want to communicate by phone and they do long for real and intimate and holy connection, with one another and with God.  They just don’t look for a phone booth – no matter how beautifully renovated and decorated – to do so. 

Our phone booth days are over but that’s no cause for desperation or despair.  What’s next?  What is the phone booth you need to retire?  What does your faith community offer to a hungry world?  Is it still sitting in a phone booth waiting for them to show up and find it?  How do the people who peer into your church doors find their way in to what you can offer?  How do you change the way you speak and offer so they can hear and partake?  How do you change the way you listen to who and where people are right now?  How do you receive the gifts they bring?

black and white phone booths.  hell's kitchen, ny

© 2013 Jim Pennucci

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photo credits:  Click each photo for a link back to its original page.  Mooney licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.  All others licensed under CC BY 2.0.

 

Arches, Aspens, and Another Pause

I didn’t plan ahead.  Thank God.  Grand Lake Colorado

I didn’t mean to leave you hanging without any posts or set-to-publish pieces ready to go, but I just took a break.  I followed my own last post and took a sacred pause.  A long one. 

sunset near Windows, Arches National Park, Utah

Rosy clouds, red arches, pewter blue sky

 

 

Balanced Rock and others at Arches National Park, Utah

If these keep silent, even the stones will cry out. (Luke 19: 40)

I wrote in my journal a lot during our sojourn through Colorado and Utah.  I reveled in the aspen trees and walked among the arches but I’m still mulling and reflecting and not quite ready to write for public consumption.  So I’m just popping in to say “hi” and share a few words and images.

beneath sand dune arch

Cool in the shadows, Sand Dune Arch

I hope these can be a sacred pause for you today.

aspen trees against orange building

Aspens, my favorite tree.

What’s a sacred pause?

shino glaze, center stripe bowls

Sacred pauses give us breathing space and a moment of connection with God.  April Yamasaki encourages us to look for and cultivate those pauses in the midst of daily living, transforming our ideas about what “counts” as spiritual practice.  Today I’m visiting with April, author of Sacred Pauses, at her website. 

She has included me as part of her interview series, where I’m reflecting on the practice of making pottery as a sacred pause. 

What’s it like to keep company with clay over time?  And how is this similar to the way God keeps company with us?  I hope you’ll click over and join our conversation.  Come on, take a moment to breathe with us.

Charlie Rose has Never Changed a Diaper

thyme growing on kitchen window ledge

Well, you didn’t think I would have a picture of that, did you?

I was drinking coffee, enjoying the leisurely wake-up of a day off, and watching CBS This Morning when I heard it.  Gayle King mentioned changing babies’ diapers and turned aside to ask Charlie Rose if he had ever changed a diaper.  He answered “no.”  I stopped drinking coffee.  I think I repeated it aloud.  I was astonished.   Charlie Rose is 71 years old and he has never changed a diaper?

I know he doesn’t have kids.  But how does a human being make it to 71 without this most basic act of care for another human being?  I suspect girls still babysit more than boys do, and so, get more practice in this skill before they ever might have children of their own.  I think King’s comment was meant, in part, to highlight the fact that women engage in this sort of domestic task more often than men, even in 2013.  But still.

I am not trying to disparage Rose himself.  I like him and have eagerly followed his work on multiple networks and shows.  But the fact of this simply astounds me.  I have not raised a child from infancy but I have changed diapers since I was in elementary school.  Visiting friends and family, babysitting, family reunions, giving a tired parent an extra hand.  I think of these as normal in-the-course-of-things moments when the possibility of changing a diaper can present itself.  I think of myself as one of the people who can help with this when needed.  I absolutely cannot imagine either never finding myself in this position or opting out of the line-up.

Let it be said, I have opted out.  I have on many occasions thought to myself I know they are tired but that is a particularly smelly one and I’m going to let his parents handle it.  But those have been momentary choices rather than a permanent status.

On CBS This Morning King joked that she and the third co-host, Norah O’Donnell, both mothers, had changed a lot of diapers:  “We don’t mind poop.”  There is a liberating matter-of-factness about dealing with someone else’s body so intimately.  Routinely changing diapers for another person can raise the bar on what you consider “gross” but it can also be a peculiar blessing.  I think this is the part that startles and saddens me when I consider Charlie Rose.  What is it like to be 71 and have lived that apart?

To be sure, I have no idea about the contours of Rose’s life and he is mostly serving as my muse today.  He could have had other experiences providing a similar connection.  I had the privilege of being with my grandfather as he died.  I also helped a friend as she gave birth to her daughter.  In addition to the diaper-changing, I have tended to others’ bodies in these intimate ways, caring for them when they needed things they could not do for themselves.  In both instances I knew I was on holy ground.  Maybe Rose has stood there, too.

My husband astutely reminds me that, besides the gender difference in cultural expectations for nurture and care, there is also the cultural fear of unrelated men caring for children in such intimate ways.  That is a fair point and one that certainly can explain the lack of opportunity for men to join in and lend a hand.  But it is sad.  For all the warranted suspicion and fear, this prevailing cultural stance also excludes and limits perfectly upstanding men from participating in some of the most important, human work in life.

So this morning’s revelation has me wondering.  We are accustomed to thinking about certain markers or milestones in life:  graduation, marriage, children, buying a home.  But what are the other markers?  What are the markers of connection and humanity that really matter?  Assisting at someone’s death or birth? Bathing and feeding a child?  Sitting with someone while they wait for treatment in the hospital?  Baking a cake for someone’s birthday?

I don’t know what goes on my list, except diaper-changing.  But I am thinking about it.  And I am giving thanks today for the real, tangible, necessary, messy, and beautiful ways I have been blessed with caring for other people.  What goes on your list?  When you are 71 (or 101), how will you know when you’ve lived a full life? 

Crossroads on a Snowy Evening

Boot brush in the English countryside.  Stanley Howe's picture is used with permission.

Here’s what you notice when you pay attention:  the boot cleaning brush mounted at the entrance to the convenience store in the country.  The one that’s not there at the doors in town by the university.  You notice that most people here wear boots, or at lease closed-toe shoes.  No flip flops in the snow (yes, you’ve seen this).  This is the kind of place that sells fudge, fried chicken, and motor oil.  This is the kind of place you only ever stop by, on your way someplace else.  Maybe, on a nice weekend, you might linger over the nearly-extinct candies of your youth.

When you spy the boot cleaning brush do you consider using it, trying it out?  Like tourists playing at the pillory in Colonial Williamsburg?  Do you know what it’s for or do you have to stop and think for a minute?  Do you wonder at the lives of the people here or do you think you already know?

What we think we know usually gets us in trouble.  It makes us scared in the wrong neighborhoods.  It makes us cliquish in the right ones.  What we think we know obstructs truly knowing.

You must admit that you have absolutely no idea who these people are and why they need to clean their boots at the gas station.  When you look, you see Hollywood stereotypes from poorly written films.  You see that you don’t see at all – that behind that brush is a community and you simply aren’t part of it.

You resolve to try more humility and less know-it-all-ness.  You resolve to pay attention in town, at the university, to try seeing the markers of those communities the way you saw that brush.  Is it the flip flops?  The crowds of solo people, each staring into their own screens in the coffee shops?  Restaurants that remodel with an electrical outlet next to every table?

When you pay attention, you notice that you haven’t been paying attention.  You have existed on auto-pilot without realizing it, floating along on a buffer of assumptions that are supposed to make your life easier.  But you don’t really want it to be easy, do you?

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photo credit:  “A country boot brush,” © 2009 Stanley Howe, CC BY-SA 2.0.

Spinach and Breadcrumbs

I made creamed spinach for the first time yesterday.  It’s not an especially Lenten dish, what with the cream and butter and cheese.  And though Lent is also not a time that is traditionally devoted to feasting this is supposed to be a space devoted to feasting.  It’s right there in the tagline:  Space to play, rest, create, feast.  Those are the ways I tend to occupy myself on a snow day and the stuff I want more of in the other days.  But so far I haven’t explicitly feasted here on the blog.  Enter the creamed spinach.

I do not own a copy of Mastering the Art of French Cooking, though I do own a copy  Julie & Julia and have watched it at least 40 times.  I am not exaggerating.  I can’t think of a better movie to have been Nora Ephron’s last, her masterpiece.  At the heart of it are two interwoven stories of loving partnership in marriage, passionate calling, and self-discovery.  And there’s Meryl Streep.

I love the love stories and I love the faltering, tentative ways that Julie and Julia both try to figure out who they are, following the breadcrumb trails of their callings in life.  Neither of them knows where it’s all going and neither is entirely confident that this is it.  But one crumb at a time they each keep going, creating, loving food, feasting.

creamed spinach in gratin dish

Recently I saw a Smitten Kitchen recipe claiming to be a compilation of the four different creamed spinach recipes in Mastering the Art of French Cooking.  I don’t own a copy but I have cooked from it and my ears perk up whenever I hear about a recipe I might attempt.  I picture Meryl-as-Julia and I hear the soundtrack and I think I could make that!  Still, I was not entirely convinced that I am a creamed spinach person.  It’s not a dish we had in my house growing up and I find that many cooked spinach dishes are spinachy in all the wrong ways:  strong green taste, stringy strands that haven’t been chopped well, kind of a big glompy mess.  But I do love spinach and I wanted to find some more go-to ways to prepare it, especially in winter when another cold spinach salad just won’t cut it.

And even though it is surprising/disappointing every single time you watch an entire pot of fresh spinach become only 3 cups of cooked spinach, it is also amazing what happens to spinach when it’s combined with just enough butter, cream, cheese, salt, and pepper.  Oh, and a few breadcrumbs on the top.  As my husband said when he tasted it, “This is the dish to start kids on so that they will never say I hate spinach.”  Fresh and creamy, but not swimming in butter-cheese-cream.  Just enough to hold it together and make your mouth happy.  The bonus was getting to use my gratin dishes, which always makes me feel a little French and sophisticated.

I find it sad that so many people don’t know how to cook anymore and that holidays like Thanksgiving are “special” mainly because so much of the meal is homemade for a change.  Though this feast came from Julia Child, it wasn’t complicated and it doesn’t have to be.  It’s acceptable to make a wonderful dish like this alongside a simple egg or even a frozen pizza.  It doesn’t have to take all day and you can make it without the special dishes.

The point is remembering to follow the breadcrumbs to the place where your taste buds stop you in your tracks and make you pay attention.  Where you know you are on to something .  Where you savor and maybe close your eyes for a second to take in the sensation.  Where the taste of simple things like spinach, cream, butter, and cheese confirm not only that you do indeed like spinach but that the rest of life is pretty good, too.

Margins

screenshot asking to print outside the established margin

Sometimes when I’m trying to print a form or a document with special lay-out features, the computer will ask me if I’m sure about that, since it will mean printing into the established margins.  I always say “yes” to this question:  I want to fit it onto one page or I like the way it looks with less white space at the edges.  The problem is, I do this in the rest of my life, too.

I recently read MaryAnn McKibben Dana’s excellent book Sabbath in the Suburbs, a reflection on her family’s year of observing a weekly Sabbath.  One of the things she learned to do during that year is to take something off the list.  When she embarks on the new day with the to-do list loaded and ready to go, she looks it over and purposely, in advance, without regret or bargaining, takes one thing off.  She intentionally chooses to leave something undone – before she’s even gotten into the day.

At a clergy gathering last year we listened to a speaker who was there to help us “manage time” and organize ourselves better.  The most helpful thing he did was urge us not to schedule every moment of the day.  I struggle with this.

And yet, when I look at the calendar and lists for the day ahead and I see more than I can do and appointments on the hour all day long, I feel discouraged before I start.  I feel like I am taking as big a breath as my lungs can handle and then trying to swim laps without taking another breath.  Until I can’t anymore.  The problem with this (in addition to the running out of air and gasping and dying part of that image) is that this type of scheduling leaves no room.  There is no room for mistakes or changing my mind or something unexpected.  There is no room to reflect on that amazing conversation I was privileged to have with a student, no room to absorb all that is keeping me so busy.

There is a strange loneliness in rushing.  It’s easy to slip across the surface of a frantically-scheduled day and come to the end of it with only a checked-off checklist.  In the margins, there is room to connect – to myself, others, and God – without goals and agendas intruding.  A quiet morning moment on the porch, sipping an evening glass of wine, time to walk around the block between meetings, an hour with nothing “to do,” a Saturday without a schedule – margins.  Space for the unknown, for inspiration.   A margin makes room for the fullness of resonance.

The best days are the ones that feel full enough.  Not harried and overflowing and breathless, just full.  With plenty going on but also a little room to breathe.  Space between this moment and the next.  Space intentionally not filled up, like the white space around the print on a page.  The margin you leave for error – or wonder.

On this snowy morning I am starting the day with a long list.  I don’t know what I will intentionally take off the list but I’m going to try to find one thing.  I’m going to tell that crazy computer mind of mine “no” this time.  No, don’t print there.  Maintain the margins.

Dust and Clay

(Getting ready for Lent to start again in a few weeks…  This post was originally written for the NCMA blog on 2/23/12.)

This week, on Ash Wednesday, we will have ashes “imposed” on our foreheads, marking us with a dusty, ashy cross as we set out on the journey towards Easter.  We will try not to be self-conscious when we see ourselves in the mirror, or clean off the stray ashes as they fall on the bridge of our noses.  We will go about our day, marked so that no one can miss it, while trying to pretend it’s business as usual.

learning to throw bigger cylinders on the wheelI’ve been thinking about Ash Wednesday a little differently this year as I’ve worked on the liturgy and prepared myself to say to people, one after the other, “Remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”  I blame it on the pottery classes I’ve been taking.

Each week, with my hands in the clay, I am reminded that I am made of the same stuff.  Each week, when we ladle soup into bowls I’ve made, I am reminded that they used to be lumps of clay.  Each week I form lumps into new shapes and I am also being formed – not just into a potter, but into someone who pays more attention.

On Wednesday as people come forward during worship, I will be holding a small blue bowl I made, which will, in turn, hold the ashes.  Dust, holding clay, holding ashes.

The journey of Lent is simply a reminder of our bigger journey:   pilgrims on the way, dusty from the road, and marked by the cross.  The journey is to practice:  paying attention, knowing who we are, seeing the big picture.  Remember that you are dust.  There is no other business than this.  We are all lumpy clay, with the Potter’s fingerprints all over us, forming and transforming us until we transform once again into dust.

Every day a snow day

winding road with a dusting of snow_monasteryMaybe it’s my winter birthday but I’ve always loved a snow day.  The world muffled and blanketed.  Cancellations and sleeping in.  Calendars and clocks taking a back seat for the day.

We don’t get a lot of official snow days around here so I decided to stop waiting for more or plotting a move to Canada.  I decided to invest more of my days with that snow day feel – space and pace.  Part of that investment is this place for reflection, creation, and conversation.

A walk through the snow makes it easy to taste and see what’s holy.  But there is holiness everywhere, every day.  I’m trying to leave enough room to notice that.